PAIN & GAIN - WRITTEN REVIEW
Good evening boys and girls it’s your ole pal Brandon here with my review of Pain and Gain. First off I must say fuckin’ a this movie rocks. I loved the ever loving shit out of this movie this was comedy gold. If you are one of those film snobs who saw Michael Bay’s name pop up in the trailer and that made you cringe and upset, I have but a few things to say to you. Get off your fucking high horse, and see this film it is one of the, if not the funniest
movie all year. If you still won’t see it because of the director or actors or whatever then go watch your indie
comedy that two people saw and also go fuck yourself you pretentious dick. Sorry about that everyone the moment I think about film snobs I just get pissed off. Where were we, oh yes Pain and Gain and why you should see this.
The movie is based off a true story, how close is it to what really happened I don’t know and believe me there is shit that happens in this movie that makes you say no fucking way that happened. The movie is about three personal trainers or the dumbest mother fuckers to ever have lived. You have Lugo the “Brains” of the whole operation, Adrian his sidekick, and Paul and big ass ex-con who is a born again Christian looking for a second chance at life.These three geniuses decide to kidnap a deli owner by the name of Victor Kershaw. Victor is this douche of douchebagery this guy everyone in the movie hates from the main characters to the police even the private investigator dislikes his ass. The reason why they want to kidnap him is to make him sign over everything he owns to them and leave him with nothing. These geniuses take three separate plans just to kidnap this guy and once they do, he figures out who Lugo is immediately. That’s when the movie’s plot truly comes in of these guys living the American dream and how if you want to commit a crime of this sort make sure you cover your tracks well.
Mark Wahlberg is great as Lugo, I hate to say it but Marky Mark is a pretty good comedian. This guy plays a stupid sarcastic asshole pretty well. My personal favorite has to be, Dwayne Johnson as Paul! You heard me correct folks The Rock plays the best character in this film. Seeing a mussel
bound guy like The Rock play as an emotionally unstable born again Christian is just the funniest damn thing I’ve seen this year. This movie is comedy gold my friend comedy gold. This is without a doubt so much fun and ridiculous, this movie is so damn ridiculous that it says “seriously this is based on a true story”. I say after working in the retail and seeing how stupid people really can be this isn’t that much of a stretch.
This movie is a Michael Bay film and I know what you’re already thinking “oh crap it is an explosion feast film with a dumb ass plot and racist characters” Well you will be right and wrong at the same time. This isn’t a big explosion orgasm that we are used to seeing in the Transformers movie but this is still a dumb movie. Just because I say it is dumb doesn’t mean it isn’t a good fun film. This was seriously a blast to watch one of the movies I can recommend to the mass audiences and not worry about a bunch of people telling me it was slow or not funny or to gory or whatever. In the end of it all this is just a fun blockbuster movie and it is worth seeing in the theaters with a bunch of friends. I have to say this movie is a full price movie worth every cent. I give this a B+.
movie all year. If you still won’t see it because of the director or actors or whatever then go watch your indie
comedy that two people saw and also go fuck yourself you pretentious dick. Sorry about that everyone the moment I think about film snobs I just get pissed off. Where were we, oh yes Pain and Gain and why you should see this.
The movie is based off a true story, how close is it to what really happened I don’t know and believe me there is shit that happens in this movie that makes you say no fucking way that happened. The movie is about three personal trainers or the dumbest mother fuckers to ever have lived. You have Lugo the “Brains” of the whole operation, Adrian his sidekick, and Paul and big ass ex-con who is a born again Christian looking for a second chance at life.These three geniuses decide to kidnap a deli owner by the name of Victor Kershaw. Victor is this douche of douchebagery this guy everyone in the movie hates from the main characters to the police even the private investigator dislikes his ass. The reason why they want to kidnap him is to make him sign over everything he owns to them and leave him with nothing. These geniuses take three separate plans just to kidnap this guy and once they do, he figures out who Lugo is immediately. That’s when the movie’s plot truly comes in of these guys living the American dream and how if you want to commit a crime of this sort make sure you cover your tracks well.
Mark Wahlberg is great as Lugo, I hate to say it but Marky Mark is a pretty good comedian. This guy plays a stupid sarcastic asshole pretty well. My personal favorite has to be, Dwayne Johnson as Paul! You heard me correct folks The Rock plays the best character in this film. Seeing a mussel
bound guy like The Rock play as an emotionally unstable born again Christian is just the funniest damn thing I’ve seen this year. This movie is comedy gold my friend comedy gold. This is without a doubt so much fun and ridiculous, this movie is so damn ridiculous that it says “seriously this is based on a true story”. I say after working in the retail and seeing how stupid people really can be this isn’t that much of a stretch.
This movie is a Michael Bay film and I know what you’re already thinking “oh crap it is an explosion feast film with a dumb ass plot and racist characters” Well you will be right and wrong at the same time. This isn’t a big explosion orgasm that we are used to seeing in the Transformers movie but this is still a dumb movie. Just because I say it is dumb doesn’t mean it isn’t a good fun film. This was seriously a blast to watch one of the movies I can recommend to the mass audiences and not worry about a bunch of people telling me it was slow or not funny or to gory or whatever. In the end of it all this is just a fun blockbuster movie and it is worth seeing in the theaters with a bunch of friends. I have to say this movie is a full price movie worth every cent. I give this a B+.